Dinner: Continued

Wyoming is a big state without a lot of people in it. Seriously, their license plates only have 5 letters & numbers on them. A cowboy riding a bronco takes up the remaining space, because when you’re a state that big with a population that small, coming up with personalized punctuation is what your State Congress does.

I see what you did there Wyoming.

It is some of the most beautiful country to drive through there is. We were excited to stop at a campground for the night. We got everything set up and decided to venture into town to see if we could buy some charcoal so we could eat something.

The town was barren. Every shop was permanently closed, and we started wondering where the people in town bought the things they needed to live and where they worked. Eventually the idea struck Nate to follow the other cars. They all lead to a Big Box Mart, which was nestled across the highway where, it appeared, all traffic in the area goes and comes from. It was like drones buzzing around their hive.

At the time, it wasn’t that creepy. In reflection, it’s scary in a Brave New World kind of way. We did purchase some charcoal and managed to make dinner that night.

Again we were woken up early in the morning by the wind. This time it was trying to smoother us with the tent wall. I had to fight my way out of a sleeping bag and nylon cocoon like a disgruntled butterfly. William sat on the tent while Nate and I deconstructed it so it wouldn’t blow away.

This disgruntled of a butterfly.

This marked the beginning of William’s claims that the King of the Wind was trying to kill him because he knew his secret. (On this trip at least, he may have made this claim earlier)

We somehow stumbled our way into Salt Lake City, which us unnaturally clean for a city. Deciding to stay for the night, we first tried the visitor center to get some information as to where we could pitch a tent. It was closed, as was most of the portion of the city where we were. We found a truck stop and asked there and were told that the trailer park next door sometimes allowed campers to pitch a tent for the night. Then he said words that would haunt us for the rest of the trip:

“Tell ‘em Brad sent ya.”

Reluctantly, (and largely at my urging) Nate drove around the “Trailer park” Brad had directed us to looking for the office we were told to ask at.

“Trailer park” was a generous term for this place. This is where trailers that have died, been buried, dug up and shocked with lightning go to die again. At the back of a park was a sea of abandoned trailers stacked on top of each other.

Grudgingly, we stopped the bar that marked the entrance to the “park” to ask for directions again. William did not want to go in with me, but I made him.

What happened next is kind of a blur. We were approached by what can only be a living mummy, years of tanning had turned her skin into leather that hung from bones, topped off by hair bleached blonde so many times it refused to obey the laws of gravity or physics. I know we talked to her (William would only acknowledge an gender neutral “it”) and did our best not to look like lunatics running out of there, but I can’t exactly recall what happened in that bar. There was a unanimous vote of “This is too much like the beginning of a bad horror movie we’re getting as far away from here as we possibly can and never coming back” and we drove all night. We didn’t stop nervously looking out the back window until we entered Nevada.

Eventually, the adrenaline wore off and we became aware that maybe we should stop for awhile. It was bright and sunny out, so we figured it was about time to eat. Nate found a rest stop and we pulled over. We had run out of charcoal the night before, and so were now left with the predicament of how to cook the delicious tuna noodle casserole we decided we wanted.

Nate and William, as it turns out, are expert foragers. They can find enough wood to build a fire and keep it going when we hadn’t seen a tree in miles. The cleaning ladies at the rest stop also gave us some wood, which we tried to thank them for, but they didn’t speak English.

All while I’m cooking, I notice we keep getting funny looks from the other people at the rest stop. William and Nate start noticing it too. It's not until we're on the road again that we realize, it's 8:30 in the morning and we were cooking tuna.

Breakfast of Champions.

Shortly after, we found a visitor center where we read about the animals of the plains and saw our first antelopes. It was around this time William, for whatever reason, started to display the depth of his slap-happiness. To this day whenever I think of him I still have an image of him in my mind as described by his words:

"I could get out of the car right now and live out there. Scrabbling off the land. Of course, I would end up naked and crazy, riding an antelope and cursing the King of the Winds."

We finished traveling at Rye Canyon in Nevada. It is a beautiful campground that I would encourage everyone see at least once in their life. It did not mark the end of our journey, but it was were we found our heads again.

After two days, we finished the trip and I would have a relatively boring existence in California for the next few months. Then the journey home, but that is another story for another time.

I call it "How Star Craft almost turned me into a hobo"